Well folks…I hope this works.
I am getting married on Saturday, October 17 at 1200 hours Eastern Time in a little burg named South Haven, Michigan. We have so little to work with, and we have to haul us back to AZ in her truck. Please help us get back here! We sure would appreciate everyone who can give a gift to get us started on the right foot! Go over to the right column and scroll down to the “Donate” button.
THANK YOU!

This has got to be the WORST NEWS I’ve woken up to in quite a while. Here, let Drudge tell you….


That’s a very good question, Matt. Here’s the answer. Get your barf bag ready and get more than one!
My God, what are those folks in Norway SMOKING? All I can figure is that for starters, this must be “compensation” for the Народный Социалистический Город-Государство Чикаго having lost the 2016 Summer Olympics.

I’d say the folks at Zynga have a sense of humor, don’t you agree?

Did I not say that Pooty was cut from the same cloth? I rest my case.

One thing which is nice about having a day off in the middle of the week is that I can stay up late. That way I can scour the wires:

TAKE A DUMP EARLY: That’s what All Nippon Airways is asking of their passengers to do before they board the plane. Not a bad idea, but poor reasoning, and it doesn’t take a Rocket Scientist to figure out why.

GUY STILL LOVES ‘RETARDED’ MADONNA: Does that mean he rides the short bus too?

BARBRA TOPS CHARTS AGAIN: I hope she wasn’t bored with her new hit, like she’s admitted to in the past.

Which is why it’s called parody.
Here I am, going through some late-night putzing around when Lo and Behold, I find this entry in another Iowahawk competition. This actually has some significance, because it’s very close to what Leonardo da Vinci could have created in another continuum.
For the full photo, click the thumbnail.

Sheriff Joe Arpaio nailed it with this simple phrase: “It’s all politics.”

As in: “Do you think your bulls**t order is going to stop me?”
He is ONE Sheriff in this country willing to ENFORCE THE LAWS keeping Illegals out. And of course, he’s always been a thorn in the side of Crappy Nappy. Even more so, now that she’s Secretary of Homeland Security.
Not to mention the side of the AFR.

Hmmm…by a paparazzi no doubt. That said, I do hope Ms. Richie is OK.

Well, the dentist confirmed an abscess in #18, so I have two choices: do the root canal and crown for about $550, which I don’t have, or have the tooth extracted and it won’t cost me anything out of pocket, since Lo and Behold I have a $64.00 credit!
Do The Math. I can have this done on Thursday, my last day off before the real fun begins. Dang it, I wish Lady E were here….Sigh....

I don’t get it.
I distinctly put in five pairs of new black socks (which I specifically bought for the wedding…can’t have white socks offsetting the suit now can I?) in the washer. Five pairs went into the dryer….
...but only four and a half came out. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!

And the final score is 48-24. I actually managed to catch this game, while in pain. And no, it wasn’t the Lie-Downs’ second-half lying down which put me in pain either, although DA BEARS’ 102-yard kickoff return for a TD didn’t help matters much either, nor did the entry of Dainty Culpepper, the journeyman QB, in the 4th quarter.
At least the Cardinals got the Bye this week….

OH! MY! GOD! The Islamofascists will s**t when they see this:

A close-up of the document reveals he was previously known as Sabourjian – a Jewish name meaning cloth weaver.
The short note scrawled on the card suggests his family changed its name to Ahmadinejad when they converted to embrace Islam after his birth.
The Sabourjians traditionally hail from Aradan, Mr Ahmadinejad’s birthplace, and the name derives from “weaver of the Sabour”, the name for the Jewish Tallit shawl in Persia. The name is even on the list of reserved names for Iranian Jews compiled by Iran’s Ministry of the Interior.

Gotta take this with a ton of salt, I’m afraid….

The #18 tooth hurts like hell, and it’s very likely that I’ll have some sort of procedure on it come Monday. All this just 14 days before my wedding.
Sucks to be me, doesn’t it.

First, there this Rio song:

And then there’s this one:

Nothin’ like a little negative psychology!