While I’m waiting for this to actually occur, let’s see what’s out on the wires:

PLAYING GOD: Doesn’t matter if it’s with dogs or mammoths. It’s not a good idea at all.

A GAYLE KING FOR EVERYONE: Sorry, Harpo, but I don’t want to be teh ghey. Good thing you didn’t kill yourself and your baby back in the day.

PRAY FOR DICK CHENEY: He hasn’t decided yet whether to go for a heart transplant, but he will soon.