Free Lunch at work today! Yes, the bosses are catering our lunch for all the hard work we’ve been putting in. Has to do with “world-class”...I swear, every time I hear that phrase I think of Ross Pee-rot! But I digress.
Here’s what’s on tap for today:

ANOTHER WARDROBE MALFUNCTION? I think it must be a slow news day in the UK. I personally don’t see any exposed nipple(s) on Beyonce Knowles’ dress. Do you?

HEISMAN SHIPPED HOME: I ain’t never heard of no “secrity.” Have you? They must be the folks who think the Heisman Trophy is a dangerous weapon in the hands of an Ohio State player (which amuses MIchigan Fans such as myself to no end).

PRESSING FOR PATERNITY: Does the Ho, who now lives in the Bahamas (gee I wonder why?), want to remain a Ho? Do we really want to find out? I sure as hell don’t!

Well I can say this much: at least my neighbors aren’t making the noises like they were last year. Of course the neighbors themselves are different, so that makes one small difference.
Instead, they argue and I can hear HIp-Hop Gangsta Rap music across the way. Now which would I prefer? Shouldn’t be hard to figure out.

Last Sunday, on my way to the Arizona Capitol, I saw this near downtown and did a double-take! At first I thought it was a martial arts studio, but on second look, it is actually an auto repair facility!

Which begs the question: I wonder how Klingon auto quality would compare to ours.
This is, of course, generating lots of interest on one of the boards I hang out on (yes, a liberal board, but it’s not Kos’ Kidz, thank God!), and yet they’re asking me for the telephone number for this shop? Sorry folks, I gotta laugh on this one, you ain’t usin’ the Net for what it’s worth!

Silly me. I forgot all about the Preferences in Camino (and by extension, Firefox) to make my text appear bigger, to compensate for the smaller screen of the MacBook and the increased distance away from my eyes, especially in the morning when I don’t have my contacts in. But enough of that.

E-MAIL DOG: The Pop-Tart friend I mentioned yesterday would definitely get a kick out of this. I just hope her Maltese dog doesn’t get jealous! (Hat Tip to BMEWS)

RICE RETIRES: As great of a player as Jerry Rice is, I hope he goes to the broadcast booth. I have a feeling he’d make an excellent color commentator. And he uses the time-honored tradition of a one-day contract so he can retire as a San Francisto 49er!

GIVE ME THE DAMN BALL...OWIE! Meanwhile, Terrell Owens, the prima donna from Philly who now competes with Keyshawn Johnson in Dallas, has hamstring problems and may miss the rest of the preseason. I sure hope Dallas rethinks about the deal they signed to get this guy.

Now here’s a great idea. I wonder which doll would represent my ex-wife....

I’m afraid I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve stated that I used to be a rabid Star Trek fan, most noticeably during my teenage years, but here’s another fan’s expression which takes the cake:

I want to know what Mel Gibson would think of this....

When I first heard about this, I damn near puked my guts out. And Basil, I hope you’re reading this...there’s now a comparison to make:
What’s worse: Britney Spears posing six months pregnant and nude for Bizarre Bazaar Magazine, or Britney Spears giving birth doggy style on a bearskin rug?
WARNING: View at your own risk. NSFW!

There are days where I don’t feel like writing, so it’s an effort. I guess you could call it writer’s block. This is one of those days, so I’ll just stick to short summaries instead of long, drawn out commentary:

ROVE OFF HOOK, LEFT UNHINGED: Is that supposed to be a surprise headline?

WOW MAN, COSMIC...NOT: I have only one piece of advice for these Commies: diversify! Diversify! DIVERSIFY! And NO, that does NOT mean you’re supposed to “...f**k and f**k and f**k and f**k and f**k and f**k and f**k and f**k...and f**k until it hurts and then f**k some more!” Besides you’re doing that already.

STANDARD ANSWER: A couple of hits yesterday from the Saudi Arabian Religious Police, checking up on what I have to say about Islamofascism. They still haven’t found the special package. HA HA HA!

And now, to go get civilized....

While the Road Trip did not go exactly as planned (what road trip does?), I nevertheless had some eye-opening experiences there, chief among which was actually participating in the filming of an upcoming HF episode, as a tape operator. Hey, you gotta start somewhere!
Anyway, I’m gone for a day and look what’s happened....

NO TRIPLE CROWN AGAIN: Kentucky Derby winner Barbaro broke his ankle early on in the Preakness. After surgery to save his life (horses with injuries such as these are usually put to sleep), it looks like he’ll have a successful career as a stud! All told, it’s now been 28 years since the last Triple Crown winner, and counting.

CAIR GOES AFTER LGF: It was only a matter of time before CAIR trained its crosshairs on one of the most pro-war sites on the Internet. May Charles and the Lizardoid minions (of which I am one) prevail!

DA VINCI SEQUELS COMING: Yes, Sony is already planning sequels based on Dan Brown’s novels. I don’t need fiction to dictate to me how to believe in Jesus Christ. So it is that I won’t be seeing any of these movies any time soon.

There you have it. Time for me to get another 9 hours’ sleep to get my body back on track for work tomorrow. 

HA! You thought since I was out of town this weekend that I wouldn’t be blogging? Not so!
That being said...this is the last time Daylight Saving Time will be scheduled for a six month duration. Next year it will be extended one additional month, beginning in the second Sunday of March, to the first Sunday in November. Now remember, that begins in 2007. I certainly hope Indiana has their act together by then! And Arizona (except for a portion of a Navajo reservation in the northeast corner of the state) does not participate in DST, because we don’t want it to be 100ºF outside at 9:00 PM!
Here are some instructions on how to put DST into effect...if you forgot to do it the previous night.

Yes, I’m up again early, off to jump on a plane to fly to Texas to see someone I haven’t seen since August of last year! And yes, she knows I’m coming.
I leave you with this little historical April Fools’ tidbit...and I don’t know if my brother knows this either: on this day in 1970, AMC introduced the Gremlin to the masses, one of the worst cars to ever emerge from Detroit. Of course, the fact that it came from a company which cobbled together parts from GM and Ford, and God only knows from where else, was bad enough.
My brother’s first car was a Gremlin. And it was this color you see here. As UG-A-LY as it was, it nevertheless probably bore witness to many rites of passage into adulthood. NO, not mine!

HAT TIP: Ranting Right Wing Howler

WELCOME Hidden Frontier readers! Welcome especially goes to Ari, who thought my use of the term “Donks” was “cute.” I definitely got a big chuckle out of that, so hence the special welcome to you. As you’ve probably seen, I don’t rant all the time here.
A special thanks to James, who got them to come here and take a look-see. While I’m at it, I should also take a moment then to announce that some time later this week I will be publishing my 1,000th POST! here. Stay Tuned!

Six more weeks of winter. Whoop de freakin’ do.

Yep, you’re sitting there, with a look of utter disbelief on your face: WHAT? Macker is posting PORN on his blog? What has the world come to?
HA HA! GOTCHA! It ain’t just porn. It’s War Porn, courtesy of the Deuce Four! I found the video deliciously ironic that it used the opening title track from my favorite show...they too have good taste! The rest of the video has German Anti-Saddam heavy metal from what I can tell. Nevertheless, it shows our Armed Forces in heroic action. Enjoy!
Now, moving on to other stories....

IRAN THREATENS REVENGE: Pardon me while I stifle a yawn...there. Nothing Mahmoud Ahmadinejad says surprises me anymore.

HAVE THEY FOUND HER YET?: Seems like “going postal” has become filler in the eyes of the MSM for when it’s a slow news day. Perhaps the Cops got her and spared us the expense of a trial.

STATE OF THE UNION ROUNDUP: President Bush kicked a**, the Dems sat on their a**es, Cindy Sheehan got her a** arrested. What more do you need to know?

CORETTA SCOTT KING, R.I.P.: Please say hello to Martin for us. Thanks for all you did.

...compared to this guy. And just think! He wants to run for President in two years! Well, with that revelation, the People of Minnesota will know how dedicated he will be to their welfare.
Anyone check his scalp yet for three certain numbers, all of which are the same?