Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer took cover yesterday behind a desk while giving a speech in Hungary. Some guy was upset about a perceived boondoggle between the software giant and the Hungarian Government, so he threw three eggses at the CEO.
Watch the video here. I saw it, and it didn’t look like there was much of a commotion. Funny...I mentioned yesterday that Ballmer heading Microsoft...with Bill Gates always lurking in the background...reminded me of Pooty’s recent job switch.

First day of over-100 temps here in the Valley. ‘Bout time! It’s been a not-as-warm spring here in AZ, and I’m not complaining. Here’s what’s on the wires:

WHOOPS: I wonder if someone on Senator Clinton’s campaign forgot to check out the sermon this morning. I’ll bet that brought back some bad memories....

BIRTHDAY GIRLS: An Aussie at 40, an American expat at 50, and a Jamaican at 60.

MORE BATTLESTAR MOVIES: Me Likey!

That’s right, chum. They even exist in South Dakota, in the wake of a May blizzard.
You know what this will be attributable to. In case you forgot, simply click on the audio.

And now, with my hairs freshly cut and a three-day weekend ahead, courtesy of a co-worker who asked to switch days with me because she needed dental work, let’s check the wires....

LABOUR GETS A** KICKED: The man who, I swear looks like Dan Rather and has signed away the UK’s sovereignty over to Brussels, Maybe he’ll have to call elections for Parliament soon and get voted out of power. Keepa U Fingers Crossed.

CANSECO LOSES HOME: And he quit paying on it. DUHHHHHH!

GERMAN WWII HERO DIES: Yes, this guy was one of the Eagles’ Nest plotters who survived the blast and never got caught.

Wow, something caused Safari to eat my resources while I was typing this...let’s see what else is on the wire:

NEANDERTHAL SPEAKS AFTER 30,000 YEARS: And I’ll bet it didn’t say “I’m switching to Geico” either.

SCOTUS RULES 7-2 FOR LETHAL INJECTIONS: The 2 were Souter and Ginsburg. Need I say more?

BUSH, POPE PRAY TOGETHER: Another board went apes**t ‘cause they were dancing with glee that the Pope isn’t going to a dinner held in his honor. I’ll bet they’ll go apes**t again!

I’m glad the US and Mexico finally worked together on this one, because of the horrific nature of the crime he is accused of. Normally, Mexico bitches and whines whenever we submit a request to have someone in their country arrested for murder, since Mexico does not have the Death Penalty. This crime had to have horrified the Mexicans too.
They say there’s no such thing as an ex-Marine. Perhaps the United States Marine Corps should create such a category for people such as Lee Harvey Oswald, Jack Murtha, and Cesar Armando Laurean, who have dishonored the Corps with their actions.
Oh, I forgot...watch the el cubos go apesh*t and hang the label Baby Killer on Laurean. Not that that’s not what he did...y’all know what I mean.

Today is not a good day for one airline in particular, and for air travelers in general:

AMERICAN CANCELS 850 FLIGHTS: Can someone please tell me why they’re still flying designs which go back almost thirty years?

BOEING DELAYS 787 AGAIN: Now, Boeing is claiming supply chain problems for the fuel-efficient airliner, which is now slated for 3Q2009. Gee I wonder why.

What bothers me about this story about Snoop Dogg’s case is not why the British Government is appealing a court’s decision to allow him in their country…
...it’s how the Associated (With Terrorists) Press refers to the United Kingdom. As simply Britain. Not GREAT Britain. Last time I recall, GREAT Britain was part of the UK’s official name, as in United Kingdom of GREAT Britain and Northern Ireland. Must be their Association With Terrorists which is disallowing the correct name to be printed.
Wait a minute...isn’t Cordozar Calvin Broadus, Jr. a former terrorist anyway?

When i was in high school, I wrote for the school newspaper. What I volunteered for, other than writing news articles, was the TV review column. I really had a lot of fun with that...and I actually managed to utter the N word in the proper context of writing about Richard Pryor’s TV comedy way back when.
But even back then, I quickly realized that I didn’t want to do that for a living. Deadlines, pressure from editors, reporting the news and not pontificating about it. Is it any wonder then why obviously don’t teach that distinction and how to look out for it?
Now there’s a web site where angry journalists can go to and vent their spleen anonymously. Turns out that regular citizens are going there too to lambaste the journalists, and I don’t blame them. It’s a fun read.

If there’s one place where very few people, if any (save the ACLU, Code Pink, and of course the owner...oh and I probably can’t leave NAMBLA off the list!), would object to the US Military’s use of this facility for urban warfare training, it’s this place. Click on the photo for more:

Yes, they could also use it as a JDAM bombing range. Truth is, you can only hit the same target so many times, and then it’ll be pounded into dust. A fitting end I say.

HAT TIP: Hud

Here’s the situation. A librarian finds that a man is viewing child pornography on a library computer. She calls the police, who arrest the guy.
And what does the librarian receive as a reward for protecting the community? Why, she gets fired of course.
Whiskey! Tango! Foxtrot!
I hope this brave woman sues the living s**t out of the library and the City of Lindsay, California!

I guess Ralph Nader doesn’t know when to quit, does he? At least we haven’t heard much coming from Ron Paul since he essentially suspended his campaign a couple of weeks ago to concentrate on his re-election (and he’s been challenged!).
In any case, I’m glad Nader’s running because he’ll siphon votes from whoever the Democrats ultimately nominate, whether that is by way of primary process or floor fight (which I’m betting on). Many Democrats blame Nader for losing the 2000 Presidential eletion. This time around, he could have an entire new army of supporters: all those disgruntled Ronulans. Should be fun to watch.

That’s because last evening, the US Navy shot down the wayward satellite which could have come down on a populated area and had a fuel tank loaded with volatile hydrazine. Three Cheers for the Navy and the crew of the USS Lake Erie!
Of course, the Russians and Chinese are p*ss*d (so what else is new?) because they didn’t get their chance to track and recover, just in case the satellite came down somewhere else other than North America. And I have to wonder if Taco Bell really did take out insurance on the contingency.

Not only was yesterday Valentine’s Day, it was Statehood Day here in AZ. We’re 96! Our managers decided to shower us with...chocolates. Woo. Hoo.
ANYhoo...here’s the F.I.I.F. wire:

SEX CHALLENGE: How this will be verified, I do not know. The one group who’s more likely than not to ask hard questions will be...the wives. Snicker....

NIU: RUN, HIDE: Yet another typical “Guns Are Evil” reaction. One of these days, there will be a student who decides to “frak the law” and take the b*st*rd out with his CCW weapon!

FRAK THE LANGUAGE POLICE, EH: Quebec goes apes**t over imported beer posters which, of course, aren’t in French. I hope this guy wins, eh.

Well folks, it’s time for another postage rate raise. Come May 12, the first-class postage rate goes up one penny, to 42 cents. So stock up on your Forever Stamps!
Remember, for all its faults, the USPS is still the most efficient postal system on the planet. I know I know, small consolation.