That is...if you were inclined to do such a thing. From an Unknown Author, and I’ve decided to tweak it just a touch:

I’m voting Demo☭rat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they’re doing because they now think we’re good people.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because I believe that people who can’t tell us if it will rain on Friday CAN tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don’t start driving a Prius.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because I’m not concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as THEY see fit.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would NEVER get their agendas past the voters.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because I believe that when the terrorists don’t have to hide from us over there, they’ll come over here, and I don’t want to have any guns in the house to shoot them with.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my horse.
I’m voting Demo☭rat because I believe oil companies’ profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn’t.

And there you have it: why Demo☭rats are Demo☭rats.